Guo Da Li - Comprehensive Guide to Betrothal Ceremony [2025]

What is Guo Da Li?

Guo Da Li, also known as the Betrothal ceremony, is an essential pre-wedding event in the Chinese culture. It signifies the formal engagement between the bride and groom's families, where the groom will present an array of gifts to the bride's family as a token of gratitude for raising their daughter and to show his sincerity in marrying her. It is typically held between 2 to 4 weeks before the wedding day.

Why is Guo Da Li important?

Guo Da Li is seen as an opportunity for both families to show respect and appreciation for each other, and to build a strong relationship that will last a lifetime. In other words, Guo Da Li is a way to solidify the bond between two families and to celebrate the couple's commitment to each other.

One of the most crucial aspects of Guo Da Li is the selection of gifts. Each dialect group has its own set of customs and traditions when it comes to gift-giving. Despite the modernisation of society, many families still hold on to these customs primarily due to the profound symbolism inherent in each gift presented by the Groom i.e. each gift carries special meanings and blessings for the couple. However, it's noteworthy that the evolution of societal norms has led to a diversification and simplification of gift choices compared to the past. 

Choosing an auspicious date for your Guo Da Li ceremony

A key element of Guo Da Li is the selection of an auspicious date for the ceremony. In Chinese culture, certain dates are considered lucky, while others are viewed as unlucky. Thus, selecting the right date is critical for ensuring a successful and happy marriage.

To err on the side of caution, some couples choose to consult a geomancer to determine an auspicious date and time for their Guo Da Li based on their Ba Zhi (八字) compatibility. It is recommended to avoid inauspicious periods of the year such as Qingming and the 7th month.

However, if the families are not date-sensitive, choosing a date when everyone is available is a viable option.

Should you follow the Bride's or Groom's dialect group for Guo Da Li?  

As previously mentioned, different dialect groups have their own customs and traditions for giving gifts. There are many conflicting advice found online whether to adhere to the bride's or groom's dialect for Guo Da Li items. 

However, the correct approach hinges upon the combined dialects of both parties. Hence, consulting a professional is important in determining the appropriate Guo Da Li items. But don’t worry, because most of the guo da li items among the dialect groups are similar except for some food items and jewelry. For instance, Teochew gifts typically include a four-piece set of betrothal jewellery 四点金, which consists of a necklace, bracelet, earrings and a ring while the Cantonese gifts include the dragon & phoenix bangles 龙凤镯.

Dialect groups and Guo Da Li: Is strict adherence necessary?

There are no hard rules to these practices. Increasingly, other dialect groups have also started to adopt other dialect's culture i.e. Singaporeans are integrating betrothal jewellery (si dian jin) into their wedding practices regardless of their dialects. For example, a four-piece gold jewelry set can be given to a Hakka bride, even though it's not part of their own cultural heritage. Instead of traditional gold, couples also welcome other types of jewellery like gems and diamonds. Another way couples are personalising their Guo Da Li is by incorporating more practical gifts. Instead of traditional items like whole roasted pigs, Grooms are now substituting them with pork trotters cans.

Essential Guo Da Li items according to your dialect groups

Check out our full Guo Da Li package here customised according to your dialect groups.

What you need depends on the determined dialect group. But all Guo Da Li should typically include all these items:

• A pair of dragon and a pair of phoenix candles
• Pin Jin red packet
• Nappy red packet
• Pork trotter cans
• 2 bottles of wine or hard liquors
• 12 oranges
• Red door banners
• Auspicious grains
• Wedding cakes/pastries
• Red tray
• Decorations
• Betrothal baskets

We've compiled a detailed list of Guo Da Li items tailored to your dialect groups below. Alternatively, if you prefer a simple ceremony, we've also curated a simplified list of items for your Guo Da Li.

For Teochew Guo Da Li:

For Hokkien Guo Da Li:

For Canto & Hakka Guo Da Li:

Guo Da Li items for a simple ceremony

Check out our simplified Guo Da Li package here.

In essence, the simplified list omits all dialect-specific food items and includes only essential items that are common across all dialect groups.

Hui Li (回礼) and Bride’s Dowry (嫁妆)

As a gesture of acceptance of the marriage and appreciation of the Groom’s family’s generosity, the Bride’s family reciprocates by returning a portion of the gifts. This act, known as Hui Li (回礼), symbolises the sharing of blessings and mutual respect between both families. On top of that, the Bride’s family will also gift additional items and angbaos to the Groom.

The bride’s dowry (嫁妆) will also be presented during the Hui Li. The bride’s dowry is given by the Bride’s parents to their daughter. It represents the blessings and well-wishes for their daughter’s marriage. The dowry items are brought back together with the Hui Li items to the Groom’s place after the Guo Da Li ceremony.

The hui li and bride’s dowry items typically include:

• Half the items of guo da li except the alcohol bottles
• 2 bottles of orange juices
• Hui Li red packet
• Parents-in-law red packets
• Son-in-law red packet
• Sugarcane red packet
• Route leading chicken red packet
• Tea ceremony set
• 5-piece descendant pail set (baby bathtub, potty, washbin, tray and mug)
• Two pairs pf red clogs or slippers
• Sewing Kit
• Bride’s red fan
• Red umbrella
• New bedsheets and duvet
• A pair of bedside lamps
• Towels
• Ruler
• Auspicious charcoal

A step-by-step guide to Guo Da Li ceremony

Step 1: Arrive at the Bride's home & exchange auspicious sayings

During the Guo Da Li ceremony, the groom and his family will visit the bride's home to present the betrothal gifts. Parents of both bride and groom have to be present. Traditionally, a female matchmaker (or a elder female relative) will also accompany the groom to the bride's house, and oversee the Guo Da Li process to ensure everything goes smoothly.

Step 2: Groom to present betrothal gifts to bride's family

For the betrothal gifts to present to the bride, do refer to the list of items we have compiled above. The type of gifts will be based on the Bride's family dialect group. Don't forget to include the betrothal money 聘金 (pin jin)! The amount of pin jin should be pre-discussed between the families. It's typically ranged between $1,888 to $8,888, usually ending with the auspicious number 8. 

Step 3: Bride's family to return gifts to the groom's family

Upon receiving the gifts, the bride's family will reciprocate the generosity of the groom's family by returning a portion of the gifts received, including the pin jin. In addition, the bride's family will present 回礼 (hui li), to express their gratitude and appreciation. We have written a more detailed guide for 回礼 (hui li) in a separate article here.

Step 4: Bride to receive dowry gifts from bride's parents

Next, the bride's parents will present a set of dowry gifts, also known as 嫁妆 (jia zhuang) to the bride. The dowry is a symbol of the wealth and prosperity of the bride's family, and signifies the blessings and well-wishes for their daughter's marriage. The dowry typically includes items like tea set, jewellery and sewing kit. The dowry gifts, together with the hui li will be brought back to the groom's home.

Looking for a guide for dowry? We have it here as well!

Places to Shop For Your Guo Da Li, Hui Li and Dowry Items

1. Changjiu Wedding – Chinese Wedding Essentials Specialist
   
   From vows to wows, Changjiu Wedding have you covered for all your Chinese Wedding essentials. They provide free online consultations, customised packages and deliver all items straight to your doorstep, all done in the comfort of your homes.
   
   Email: changjiusg@gmail.com
   WhatsApp: +65 8887 9834
   Website: www.changjiu.sg
   Instagram: @changjiu.sg
   Services: Guo Da Li, Bride's Dowry, Bed-Setting, Hair Combing, Tea Ceremony.
2. Sweetest Moments – Guo Da Li cakes
   
   Email: enquiries@sweetestmoments.com.sg
   Services: Guo Da Li cakes
3. Huat Huat Cakes and Pastries – Guo Da Li cakes and bing
   
   Address: Blk 49 Sims Pl, #01-48, Singapore 380049
   Services: Guo Da Li cakes and traditional bings
4. Celebox – Guo Da Li Cakes
   
   Email: enquiry@celebox.com.sg
   Services: Guo Da Li cakes
5. Pine Garden – Guo Da Li cakes and Bing
   
   Email: enquiries@pgcake.com
   Services: Guo Da Li cakes, traditional bings and candies.

Navigating Guo Da Li: Embrace and enjoy the process!

Albeit Guo Da Li is an important tradition to Chinese weddings, it's not a strict one. As society and Chinese weddings have evolved, so has the practice of Guo Da Li - many practices are no longer strictly followed. Whether it's through the use of jewellery, practical gifts or other modern touches, the spirit of Guo Da Li remains the same: a gesture of goodwill and respect between two families coming together in love and marriage.